Thursday, March 08, 2007

Say no to Helplessness,Fight back.

I spoke about it last year too and i am ready to do it again,i am Talking about Blank Noise Project,How did you retaliate? being helpless wont help you,and as i always said,dont be a victim,no one has a right to do anything to you,fight back and in whatever way you can,protest and it sure helps.

January 2007,i was walking back from the college where i had gone for a guest lecture,Auto strike and my house was two km away,a narrow lane in Mehadipatnam,Hyderabad and being new to those lanes i asked help from a stranger who was fiddling with his phone standing with his bike at the pavement.
all i wanted to know was if that particular lane leads to VijayNagar colony and he said yes and even while i thanked him and started walking away he offered me a lift which i rejected only to realize that he is following me and kept pestering and the lane was all quite in the mid afternoon and there was a huge MCH park to one side and a building at construction to other side,and when i yelled at him and tried walking away he just cut my path with his bike and held my hand and in a few sec my mobile fell down and so did my handbag,and i just punched on his face,
Yes,i did and even when he lost his balance and fell down along with the bike i just walked around and hit him hard on his face and he did try hurting me and by then a few people passing through the lane stopped and tried beating him up and the Bastard had the guts to say that he was innocent and was only trying to help me,by then someone called the police and half an hour later i walked back home all the way.
Called hubby who was in some other city and he was shell shocked and took the next flight to be home in three hours only to see me sleeping sound.
Why was i not scared? asked him.Was i not? ofcourse i was,but then i know not to be a victim,i learnt it as a kid and i follow it till i live,for him it was a first instance where a women had to handle such a situation,his family is protective about daughters and mostly women are escorted when going out and many of them stay home {what a luxury} but for me this is how i survived my childhood or college days.

I had no choice,my mom couldn accompany me for my morning 5am classes or night 10pm home coming in a bus,i had to walk back a km daily to reach home,and being a single parent is not an easy job,and she did her best,she gave me one line which i follow till date "fight but never giveup without trying,you can always help yourself,just try" and i do.I do wish i had my father to drop me at college,bring me back from classes,escort me to picnics and movies,but i learnt living on my own and fighting back eve teasing or those good for nothing idiots on roads which think women are a commodity.
Hubby said "i am proud of you" oh,thankyou,so am I. and amma said "Thank god it was you at that moment,what would happen if it were someone who dint know how to fight back?" I hope not,yes,even i think i thanked god for a moment that it happened to me instead of someone who could have been helpless,but i wish and hope there were no helpless victims.
I tell my students also,tears will never solve any problem in this world and there is no problem without a solution either,dont stop yourself from doing things just because you are worried about the big bad world outside,being secure is good,enjoy it while it lasts,but when it comes to surviving on your own be ready to do so,Help yourself and the world will salute you,more than anything you will understand your own worth"
Happy women's day world,I am proud to be a woman and when i have a daughter i will tell her how precious it is to be a woman.


Stone said...

Good job dear friend!!!'
Really inspirational!
Take care!

The Mad Momma said...

that was an excellent example of fighting back.. i wish i had done this years ago... i will do it now if i get the chance.. its amazing how much courage you get from such stories...

came here via the BNP blogathon where i have posted too... and i must say i am proud of the number of women who have stood up for themselves...

Space Bar said...

this happened to a friend when we were in college: a guy came up to her in the middle of the afternoon (when roads are pretty deserted) and grabbed her. She was learnign judo, so she hit him. But he hit back. and the cops refused to file an FIR. And she wandered around for days with a black eye.


Tulan said...

very brave. I admire your guts and instinct. always keep it with you , it will help you a lot in this kind of situations. i think all women while in school or college should take a self defense class or should be mandatory in high to offer it as a course. it will help a lot

Invincible said...

I am sorry to read it hppnd with u 2nd time. I very well remember reading ur prior post n that too not very long ago.

You are really brave n tenacious to fight back. Such bastards deserve no less than a public beating. Did the cops took him in ?

(belated) Happy Women's Day !

krishnapriya said...

hi aalapana..that was an awesome post. I keep wondering why we dont have the guts to fight back at these kind of miscreants. We all have the inner power..but a handful few fight back. Why we women fall back and wait for someboby else to take action is something i could never understand. Empowering women is the key which has to be done at a parental level. INstead of telling children ( i mean girl child) to cower, they should be taught to be bold and be quick in action..for the ones who are upto these kind of actions are basically cowards trying to boost up thier ego by such antics. i enjoyed reading your blog.


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