Tuesday, April 18, 2006

"bas ek chup sii lagi hai nahii.n udaas nahii.n,kahiin pe saans rukii hai nahiin udaas nahiin,bas ek chup sii lagii hai"

I walk through all the darkness towards a new begining,yet to reach the destination but i feel lost,did i do the right thing by taking this path? Was i not happy being where i was? In my own world,busy with work and life in general? why am i not excited but nervous?
why am i silent than before? why do i just smile when friends say i dont talk to them now that i am busy with preparations for a new begining? Why cant i tell them the truth that i dint even start thinking of it?
Why dont i scream and say that i am busy with work as before and nothing special? why dont i complain when none of my friends contact me as before? Where is it all leading to?
i have no idea if i am happy and grinning all the while with the expectations of a new begining,But i know yesterday night i just kept staring at the sky from the windows for a long time,will i have to leave everything and walk away from here? New beginings end the past? that which is filled with so many memories? Nothing will be mine here now? Or is it all in the way we look at life? For now i am lost in silence.
And with all the changes which walked into my path one thing is quite clear,I now know who is a friend and who is not.Now when i see people who were a part of my life once, walk past me without looking at me,i dont feel sad,I know we never were destined to be together,Too late,Now i dont use the word friends so easily,And now i dont trust words so easily.Lifes lessons always amaze me.

I miss my life which i was a part of and now i am no where related to it.Wish i can bring back those times of happiness without any worldly responsibilities,Wish i could spin around the time and go back to such times of innocence and happiness,Just a wish..........

Na jaane kyon, hota hai yeh zindagi ke saath
achanak ye man
kisi ke jaane ke baad, kare phir usiki yaad
chhoti chhoti si baat, na jaane kyon

vo anjaan pal,Dhal gaye kal, aaj vo
rang badal badal, man ko machal machal rahen,
na chal na jaane kyon, vo anjaan pal

tere bina mere nainon me
Toote re haay re sapanon ke mahal
na jaane kyon, hota hai yeh zindagi ke saath ..


Atul Sabnis said...

if you think abt it all lessons from life will amaze us. you would know however, any lesson isnt complete without a test of our learning. and the way to understand a lesson is to do the test right - else - we just think that the lesson is amazing - and potentially miss out on the true meaning of what the lesson was all about. The key is to ask the right questions.


s! said...

the only thing that is constant in life is change.. we keep moving on, new phases, new faces, new places..

d4u said...

Change is eternal but whatever said and done...all I wanna say is all the best for your new beginning:)

satish said...

Hi Alps,

Everybody wants a change in the life and putting lot of labour to see the change and you are worried about the change.

Take the life as it comes, Just hope for the best. Thats what a human can do, at least for the things which are not in our hands. :)

All the best for ur new begining.

Invincible said...

Life moves on, whether someone is with you or not, whether others treat u the same way or not, whether you matter to them or not. So pls dont sulk over it, may be they were just weeds that time purged out.

"Life's lessons always amaze me"
so true !

Gangadhar said...

Ohhh..i'll come back soon..need to say...

Usha said...

We all miss the good old days we have to leave behind as a aprt of growing up. But we cannot cling to them but keep moving on preserving the memories and the lessons along the path.
Wish you all the best in every new step you take.

Manish said...

Log sochenge ki lo ab to iski zindagi mein sab kuch badal sa raha gaya . she must be preoccupied with so many things.....)
aur aap sochoge are kuch bhi to badla nahin hai abhi to wahi kar rahi hoon jo kal tak kar rahi thi..
kal aap kya karoge uski chinta mat karein, u will certainly do the things u enjoy doing aaj bhi aur aane wale kal mein bhi...

Gangadhar said...

i'm sorry that i was away..
Life is about change, and you can adapt easily to the new..Though no one can go back and make a new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new end.And I'm sure..you won't let the lessons or experiences of the past dampen your enthusiasm for new beginnings.
And I guess from your post that it's all for the welfare of yours..Go ahead...

All the best

Alapana said...

Atul,i would say the Key is to find the answers,i am not scared of giving the test,I am only tired of the constant tests,and i am confident i will clear them all and come out of it fine,but the process is getting never ending,is it wrong to expect at times from someone dear? maybe Yes,or maybe No,its all in the way i look at things?:)

S! yeah,change is inevitable,i am not tired of new faces and new phases of life,i am amazed at the flow of it all,the No. of exp which i am loosing count upon:)

Ash said...

Came over from zypsy's blog. Very well written. I sometimes don't like the lessons that we are supposed to learn, expected to learn (and not to mention being unsure whether we did learn those exact things) or for that matter the fact that no relationship is permanent. That hurts the most. :)

kaunquest said...

yoon chalte rahiyegaa, sehraa ke aage bhi to jahaan hai, rangeen waadiyaan hai, manzilen aur bhi hain..Kyaa pataa, kis moD pe nayi umanGe liye zindagii hai, aapke intezaar mein... yoon chalte rahiyegaa
Aap ko to yaad hoga Majrooh saab ka yeh sher,

Mai akela hi chala tha jaanib-e-manzil magar
log saath aate gaye aur kaarva banta gaya

Manish Tripathi said...

Always the same hum-drum, that why things are not happening in the way they used to be.
After 4 consecutive failures, I realized that I was chasing my past.
New day new challeges-hence new solutions-hence new tactics..!!!
I think that's the only beauty of life.
Just think how bore the life would had , if we know in advance that what's going to happen next.

White Magpie said...

Sigh!! too bad you didnt put a mp3 of that song. I got nostalgic. Plus your article echoed what everyone goes through. Methinx memories trouble us cause we haven't lived the experience completely and some part buried deep within wants to go back and live it again to be able to fulfil it.

Trick is to move on and live completely. Loved ur writing.

Alapana said...

Invinci,Not sulking,contemplating maybe:)

Ushaji,thanku,i need a lot of best wishes,and been very busy,will mail you soon:)

Manishji,shukriya dost,main bhi yehi chahathi hoon:)

Alapana said...

gangadhar,No,i wont let my past take over my future,for sure:) its a new begining and i would start it with a smile and a fresh page in the book of life. thanku

Ash,exactly,it hurts to see people leaving:) and it hurts more to remember that we were genuine and trusted it all to be true,but it ends one day,no reasons given,no looking back,and we,keep waiting,for long:)

Raj said...

wow :)

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