Sunday, August 19, 2007

Ek roj Zindagi...

"But sir,you always scold only me,Because i am short,and because i sit in front bench you always point out at me,you don't say anything to the other girls"
11am to 11.40am the staff room becomes a fish market,utterchaos, confusion and the Students
surround the teachers for everything and anything during the break time and the attender does a rope walk serving Coffee and the quota of two biscuits per teacher,
Thankfully i don't need to wait for him,i have no regards for the coffee or the Britannia Marie biscuits,so i seriously concentrate on TOI which is scattered by pages on each table,i was on the collection spree,collecting page 14 from the colleague who rarely smiles and asking for the Bangalore times from the one who annoyingly plays high music on his mobile phone,Yeah,he carries his phone in the shirt pocket with the loud speaker on and Tamil music playing,
and in midst of all this i heard a those words,coming back to my seat i tried looking at the direction where it came from.She is short,cute with her spectacles,controlling her frustration and trying hard to talk to the teacher with out letting her tears roll out of her eyes, One of her friend was trying to pacify and take her away but she was adament,she insists that he always scolds her and that today she was not making any noise but he still scolded her. "Because i am short you always notice me and make fun of me" she repeated.

I dont know what went on for the next 5 min but i just kept staring at her,i am not looking at her,her height or her tears, i am looking at the resolve of a girl who walks into the staff room to say that she is right and that she trusts herself while saying so.

I so wanted to talk to her,but i know it is wrong to involve when i am no where concerned,i just wished the teacher would clarify that the height was not an issue at all and that it dosnt matter,but No,he was busy clarifying other things.Do i involve or not? i knew i couldn and my dear collegue and friend who sits next to me and we both share a good friendship stopped me saying it wont be good if i spoke then.

She was going off,along with her friend,i just stood up and walked out of the room,she was there,in front of me,walking fast and furious still,i dont know her name,nothing,not even the class she is from,I need to tell her something,she was waiting near the lift,i just smiled and she looked at me,smiled back after a few seconds.
Hesitantly a few words came out from me "Girl,never let others takeover your confidence,Does it matter that you are short or someone else is fat or lean? if they think so let them be,Be proud of who you are and you know what,you have a wonderful confidence which will help you turn your dreams to reality,By the way you are the one who won the first prize in Debate,Isn't it" Bright eyes,filled with laughter,smiling,enjoying all the credit which is due she replied "Yes ma'am,and ma'am i know you"
"Do you?" Yes ma'am,you won the Anthyakshari competition conducted for the faculty,i remember the last song which you sang,its my dad's favorite song,You teach Consumer Behaviour,My cousin is in your class........"

After spending ten min talking,laughing,smiling it was time for good bye,she was going up to the canteen,"we are celebrating,she says with pride,i won so i am giving a treat,ma'am,join us"
No dear,you have fun, i have a class now.

Yes,i have a class now,but before that i have a word to talk to,to myself,to remind myself how it always affected me as a kid that i was fat,that i was tall and that i was always made to sit in the last bench,how i was laughed at,and how i had those tears welling up in my heart,but i did fight back, with my insecurities,stood up when i was right,fought back when i was humiliated,and i won,won over my insecurities ,it hurts to remember but i don't want to forget,i have more battles and it gives me strength to remember.

and while i was walking back to the staff room,i am greeted by my students,most of them with a smile,a few stopping to share a news,one stopping me to say that she had a fight with her best friend,a group rushing to me saying that they won the cricket match and one boy waiting for me to clear his doubts in Leverage Analysis and i have a class waiting for me to deal with Ethics in Subliminal Advertising and i recollect that song which i sang at the anthakshari....

"Tere girne mein bhi theri haar nahi,ki thu admi hain hain avtaar nahi.....zindagi hasne gaane keliye hain pal,do pal,isse khona nahi,khoke rona nahi......." Isn't it true "Life is to share the laughter and music,don't loose it all and cry for what you have lost.........Don't worry about failures,you are afterall human,Not god..."

Pic courtesy :Deviant Art.


jupallis said...

Hi Alps,

Me first...
Nice post. After reading the post I could recall the dialog from Anand ... Zindagi badi honi chahiye, lambi nahin (life should be grand rather than long).

Now you can read my blog.. at last I’m busy so posting regualry.

wise donkey said...

brought a tear to the eye.

i can feel how it must have been for the girl, since school and college had its share of challenges for me.

i still remember standing up to a teacher Ms.Khan, and arguing about a point in history and being adamant about it, only to be proved wrong.
disappointed we sat down, but I will never forget what she told us "Have confidence, thats good". I still think thats the most valuable lesson i learnt at school.

And congrats on the Antakshari:) And what a beautiful song:)

Hirdu said...

Sorry, I missed you yesterday on yahoo :)....

anyhow ...I am trying my best to come back on blogs :) soon....the threads of posting shall start

GuNs said...

Aaah wow. It is always nice to have teachers like you. I remember we had a teacher who taught chemistry in junior college and she was young and very helpful to all of her students.


Stone said...

Yours these post always make me :-)

Usha said...

I so envy you to be able to touch the lives of young people in so many nice ways and be able to make a difference. This is what I would have loved to do with my life.
I am so glad that you are making a difference to their lives.

comfortably numb said...

Links to links to links brought me to your complains though...

A trully beautiful article!! Reminds one of the school and college days...the fun days...wish all teachers were as nice as you:)

PS: The format and color selection of ur blog is grt too!!

starry nights said...

Nice post and enjoyed reading it.I wish more teachers were like you.what difference does it make whether you are short,tall,lean or fat.I think all should be treated equally.

My Life, My Music....... said...

A good teachers can see the invisible things in students that can make them successful in school and in life. However, unlike the weather forecaster, who can do little to change or control the weather, a good teacher will use their ability to see the invisible and then to take action. Lucky students............

Anonymous said...

Enjoyed the post. I usually do not like to leave comments. But after reading the post, I couldn't help but leaving a note on how moving it is to see you helping the girl retain her confidence. Keep it up!

Madhavi said...

Hi Alapana! you have a surprise waiting for you in my blog.Hope you see you soon there.

Tulan said...

Hey aalapana if u can email that song that we talked from movie MASOOM i think it is about in the previous post would be really great. my email addy is

Tulan said...

great post and it was a really really nice thing to do. Good to know there are nice teachers and people out there

shub said...

You must make a wonderful teacher :-)
And I saw the comment on my blog. You moved to B'lore recently? Hope you're liking it so far.

Madhavi said...

Hi Alapana!
how r u?
Where were you this weekend.hyd or blore.listeneing abt byd blasts iam really worried abt you as you said u will be going to your moms place for pooja!plz do mail me that you are safe and fine.

@$#!$# said...


:) u r a really good is not an easy task to make students feel good..

btw...u teach consumer behavior?yaar tell m some beginner level books that talk about consumer behavior. not really advanced stuff, but something basic. mujhe padhna hai

Alapana said...

Satish,Thank you,and yes,apt quote,i love the movie and the dialogs also:) read your blog,just that had no time to comment,will be back soon there.

Gaya, isn't it the greatest virtue to have confidence? Because i feel it helps you win over life's bitterness which keeps crossing our path all our life.
Yes,its a beautiful song.

Alapana said...

Hirdu,will wait for the threads of posts:)

Guns,teachers are always good,young or not:) and don't we all remember our teachers, those who made a difference to our life's:)

Alapana said...

Stoneji,glad it makes you :-)

Ushaji,i don't know how far it makes a difference to them but being with them i relive all my life,they make me learn so many things from time to time and these young kids of today are far more intelligent and full of life,this is what i wanted to do all my life and i am going to do it as long as possible:)

Alapana said...

Comfortably numb,so i would like to thank the links to links to links who helped you pave your way to my blog;p welcome to aalapana. and The credit goes to a friend who did the template for me:)

starrynights,it doesn't matter to you or me but there are people outside for whom it does and it worries me that too much imp is given to physical appearance,i wish i can change the attitude.

Alapana said...

my life,my music,{Rohit} thank u so much,it was wonderfully put,how these words are used to give a magical feel,isn't it,if it helps the girl i would do it again and again.

Dear Anon,Thank you,sometimes comment help:)

Alapana said...

Tulan,will do it soon.

Madhavi, thank you,more at my food blog soon and will write to you too:)

Shub,not much love for the city,It all depends on where i live and the place is all hep happening and i am one bore for such atmosphere:) so might shift to another locale.

Ashish,i don't know first stage, or initial easy books,i know CB by Schiffmann which is supposedly wonderful,infact i would say go for it.

Dimple said...

Heyy U have been


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